In this essential article, we had the privilege of interviewing Tahnee Clark, the CEO of LYSN, where we delved into the crucial factors that shape our body image, the impact of social media on our perceptions, the growing trend of procedures like butt implants, and most importantly, what we can do to foster a positive body image and manage any related issues.
- When do we form our sense of self in terms of body image?
From the moment we are born, we are exposed to information that teaches us about who we are. We have millions of mirror neurons inside our brain that help us pick up life skills through observational learning. These mirror neurons also provide us feedback about what behaviours and characteristics influence the amount of attention and positive feedback we get from others. For instance, how someone responds to us when we smile or giggle vs when we kick or push influences our self-concept and motivates our future behaviour. We generally start to form a sense of self from around 2-3 years old. According to a recent report by the child advocacy group Common Sense Media, children as young as 5 are concerned about body image. Our body image progresses when we discover mirrors and understand the concept behind it.
- What are the most likely factors to influence that?
There are many factors that are likely to influence body image. However, the early factors are usually the health of our attachment to people who play a primary role in our lives (such as parents, siblings and friends), how these people behave (such as encouraging and coaching us to pose for the camera) and the messages (such as media) we are exposed to. Relationships that focus on our appearance, reinforce that our value is based on our looks. Parents have a particularly strong impact on the development of self-concept and body image. How they talk about their own bodies can negatively or positively impact their children. The recent report by the child advocacy group Common Sense Media, revealed that five- to 8-year-olds who think their mothers are unhappy with their bodies are more likely to feel dissatisfied with their own.
- In your opinion, what are the risks/dangers/benefits of social media on women's body image?
Social media can be toxic for body image because it is very visual and the number of likes or follows we get can be based solely on our appearance. The number of likes and follows can be perceived as a benchmark that feeds directly into our sense of self-worth. Then there’s the aspect of instant feedback which can be both positive and negative, but it is not monitored or filtered and unfortunately, we can be exposed to negative comments very quickly. There are also many software tools now available that allow people to manipulate an image to look more ideal and perfected. The images we see are often a warped sense of reality that create unrealistic expectations. Some people can get caught up comparing themselves to others, without realising that these images are filtered or fake and unrealistic to look that way. Social media has many positives including allowing access to information, education and friendships that we may otherwise be disconnected from. However, it requires a level of emotional intelligence and maturity to be prepared for the not so good elements of social media. Technology is developing faster than we can fully understand it. It’s important to develop strong social networks with people that care about us and use these relationships to guide our self-concept, more than from strangers on the internet.
- Do you think the rise of things like butt implants helps us accept more curvaceous bodies or does it have a negative impact?
This can be a controversial topic that can activate strong emotions. Ultimately, it’s your body. I think the answer certainly lies within the person. Everyone is different and will react differently to certain trends. For some, seeing variety in argumentation is certainly likely to demonstrate that many shapes and sizes are desirable and beautiful. This may encourage them to accept their body as it is and allow them to embrace their curves. However, for others, it is likely to put pressure on them to look a certain way (which can be very detrimental to someone’s mental health, especially if it is sought through dangerous means or is unattainable). Cosmetic trends and enhancements are here to stay, and just like technology and social media, the most important discussion is how to support ourselves and others to live compassionate, meaningful and purposeful lives. How we get there is really up to the individual.
- What are some practical things women can do to help manage any body image issues?
It can be easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself with others, especially those who are famous. However, this can be unhealthy for your mental wellbeing. Firstly, try to learn to love yourself for who you are and place less emphasis on comparing yourself to others. Sure, you can do things to make yourself look and feel better, but a kind heart, warm eyes and a bright smile is what really counts. Learn to love your wrinkles because they can remind you of all the times you smiled, or embrace cellulite or stretch marks because your body has had many experiences over the years. Secondly, focus on the incredible things your body can do, your everyday mobility or birthing children are wonderful blessings. We develop positive body image when we feel comfortable in our skin – this includes how we feel in others personal space and the confidence that our body can do what we need it to do. Team sports and physical playfulness are a great way of developing connection and confidence with our body. It’s helpful to engage in practices that help you to understand your body and appreciate what it can do – whether it’s yoga, pilates or the gym – these activities remind you how powerful your body can be no matter what age you are. Thirdly, just like a car, or any other possession you value, your body needs attention and maintenance. Treat your skin and body kindly, and it will be kind to you. Moisturising, staying hydrated, eating nutrient dense foods and being sun smart, all add up. And last but not least, surround yourself with positive people who can help to support you in all areas of life and reinforce a positive outlook.
- What else would you like to say about achieving/maintaining a positive body image?
Always try to remember that everyone sees through a different lens. Each person’s lens is influenced by a number of factors including their direct societal pressures and norms as well as their personal opinion and core beliefs. Your stage in life and the societal period or era also plays a big role. As humans, we are naturally attracted to things that feel familiar and popular. During the stage in life when we are breaking away from our family systems to find an identity among peers, we put pressure on ourselves to fit in with the features of those around us. That doesn’t mean that these features are ideal to the global population, but they are acceptable to those in our closer geographical circle. Our connection with the wider world through social media creates another level of tug of war between what societal norms we now are striving to ‘fit’. Those who were once teased in high school for particular features, such as bushy eyebrows, often experience acceptance and praise from a different audience – particularly once they are older. You, in all of your grace and self-perceived flaws are what makes you beautiful and unique. It’s time to train your brain to remember that. Focus on practicing some self-love. Self-love isn’t about vanity or ego, is about being kinder to yourself and your body. It’s the best beauty trick in the book! Not only does it feel good, but kindness helps the body release powerful stress-combating chemicals that improves health and graceful ageing. Focus on the things you value and do love about yourself. Self-love doesn’t happen overnight, it’s an ongoing process that you should practice daily to help stop that inner voice from criticising yourself.
Tahnee Clark is the CEO and Psychologist at Lysn
Lysn is a digital mental health company with world class wellbeing technology which helps people find their best-fit professional psychologist with online tools to improve mental health.
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