Throughout our lives people can be prone to experience various ups and downs, including ‘bad’ days that can make a person feel unhappy every now and then. Experiencing varied emotions and bad days here and there is considered normal and not typically a cause for concern.
It’s when these bad days starts to happen every day or for weeks on end that it can be an issue. If having a bad day seems to become a pattern of behaviour and you can’t seem to shake those feelings, it might be time to talk to someone. But what if those bad days are happening to your partner? How can you tell if they’re struggling with poor mental health?
Below Lysn Psychologist Nancy Sokarno details some warning signs that the man in your life might be suffering from a mental health concern.
LOSS OF JOY
A loss of joy is a sign that someone might be struggling with their mental health, especially if they’ve seemingly lost their lust for the things that they used to find enjoyable. Perhaps your partner used to like after work catch ups with his friends on a Friday night and now they don’t go, or they have given up their favourite pastime like soccer or surfing.
FEELING ‘DOWN’ ALL THE TIME
If your partner’s overall demeanour seems ‘down’ and as though they’re not their usual selves, it could be cause for concern. Especially if their mood is low for weeks on end (usually over two weeks is a sign that something might be seriously wrong). As mentioned previously, everyone has their ups and downs in life, but that kind of mood shouldn’t be an ongoing thing.
REACTING DIFFERENTLY
Has your partner been reacting to things with sudden outbursts or usual responses such as crying when they would normally be happy, or angry when they would normally be sad? When your partner reacts to a scenario quite differently to what he normally would, can sometimes mean they’re struggling with mental health concerns. For example, he could snap or be overly agitated in response to a seemingly trivial thing or get upset at a joke that wouldn’t normally offend him. Again, everyone can have bad days, but if you notice it frequently it could be time to seek help
ALWAYS GETTING SICK
Physical sickness can often be a sign of some other mental health concerns at play. For example, if someone is constantly stressed, this might eventuate in being run down and getting physically sick. If your partner seems to be continually getting sick, it might be worth looking at what else is happening in their lives which could be the root cause.
SUBSTANCE ABUSE
If your partner increases drinking or starts abusing substances, even prescribed ones, this is a red flag that something else might be going on. People often turn to substances as a way to ‘escape’ from their reality or numb any pain they might be experiencing, but unfortunately it can actually make things a lot worse.
OTHER SYMPTOMS
Other signs may include changes in weight or appetite, fatigue or loss of energy, and difficulty concentrating or making decisions. However, one single symptom doesn’t necessary indicate a mental health issue, but rather it’s a combination of symptoms that may signal it’s more than just having a bad day.
WHAT YOU SHOULD DO
Any of the above things can be a sign that your partner might be suffering from a mental health concern, so it is important to treat it seriously. Consider first talking to them about what might be happening, simply by opening up the lines of communication and really asking how they are. There are so many ways to help, and a key point is to normalise mental illness. If the men in our lives are feeling some type of way, to accept that and hold the space for them is one of the greatest things we can do - after all, mental illness doesn’t discriminate so it’s important to ensure we help them start to feel okay not being okay.
Starting the conversation and dialogue is a key factor in how we can support our Aussie men. Getting them to start to be curious about how they feel and why, facilitating the use of statements of “I feel x because of y” are great places to start. Encouraging our men to engage in supports like reviewing their mental health with their general practitioner or seeing a psychologist will allow help in protecting our men from poor mental health, self-harm or even suicide.
As with anything, prevention is better than cure so it is truly important to remember that we don’t necessarily need help when are in the thick of things, we can simply start the ball rolling when we become aware that things aren’t going to well. If your partner doesn’t seem to feel comfortable talking to you, that’s ok, but it’s important to suggest other places where they might feel comfortable talking. Lysn often has same day appointments, that you can book online 24x7, review clinician profiles and select your preferred clinician.
Nancy Sokarno is a psychologist at Lysn
Visit welysn.com 24x7 to select your preferred clinician.
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